KIN - the people to whom we are bound by blood or by marriage.  Why is it that the ones we love are the ones who sometimes hurt us the most?

Jesus encountered the same phenomenon with His earthly family.  At one point they came to take Him away because they were afraid He was "out of His mind." [cf. Mark 3:21]

Those who think they know us the best because they have known us the longest may be in the worst position to measure our growth.  They may become unsettled when we change.  They can be the most threatened by the different approaches to life we take as we mature.  Therefore they may actually resist our growth and inhibit change.

It's no surprise that Jesus warned us, ". . . a man's enemies will be the members of his own household." [Matthew 10:36]

While it is not true of everyone, the patterns we develop with our families can become ruts that keep us from trying new things or growing in new ways.  It costs us something to take the risk of change.  We feel like we are jeopardizing the commitments with those we love and don't want to hurt. 

Why do we get paralyzed by the people we regard as our closest kinfolks?  How can we get "unstuck" from the "ties that bind us" without losing the love we so desperately need to survive?

Jesus offers challenging words as His solution to overcome the negative influences of family relationships which inhibit our personal and spiritual growth.

"Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; and anyone who does not take up his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.  Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." [Matthew 10:37-39]

Jesus calls us to overcome destructive aspects of our kindred relationships by committing ourselves first of all to Him.  By surrendering our lives to Christ, we will find the solution to family barriers to growth.

The surprising outcome will not be the demise of the family and the breakdown of kindred commitments.  Instead, the Spirit gives us a new family comprised of all who ". . . do  God's will."  As a result we will rebuild new and better family relationships based on Jesus as the Head of the clan.

It is not without risk, even pain.  However, the outcome represents an eternal kinship offering new and great possibilities for the future that no family past can take away. 

• What are some examples how your family has hindered your growth?
• What are some patterns that have become family ruts for you?
• How might putting your allegiance in Jesus free you for growth?